Thursday, November 17, 2011

Born to Join the Dance!

Every once in a while something crosses my mind and leaves me breathless.  One of those breath taking ideas is definitely the Trinity; the belief that God is One and Three, Three and One all at the same time.  Trying to grasp this concept stretches me beyond myself into the supernatural or into the mystical.  Thinking about the Trinity, have you ever wondered what they did together before time began, before the sun, moon and stars were created?

Many Theologians have asked that question, “What was God doing before creation?”  After much study, they have landed upon a word that describes what God was doing, “perichoresis.”  It describes the interpenetrating and mutual indwelling of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit in One Another.  So what are they doing?  The Father and the Son and the Spirit were in an endless dance of endless love and surging joy and delightful play as they enjoyed the depth of their love for One Another.  They were dreaming of human beings and their personal relationships with each other, relationships that go to the guts of eternity, discovering this dance of Life for themselves. 

God created the first movement, a revolution of love generating the very core of life, in God’s own life where there is this throbbing joy of mutual indwelling.  It’s called love.  Love is God’s gift to us to enjoy this love in and through one another.  When we love, we enter in and participate in this mutual indwelling of one another.  Entering this dance of eternity is stepping into the adventure and plans for eternity.

This deep mystery of life reveals that Life itself is personal.  To believe in God through Jesus is to enter this mystery.  God came to earth in Jesus and became human.  Through Him this dance becomes possible.  The deepest dimension of the Kingdom dream and of life itself that we are persons who dwell with other persons, and only in loving others do we tap into the core of that mystery.  When we experience this, we unlock our future!

Scott McKnight says, “If you want your job to matter, then keep in mind that life itself is about perichoreting with others – with your spouse or with your family or with your friends or with your community of faith or with your city or with your country or with the world and with those with who you work.  What we do matters when what we do is seen as something designed for persons.”

I grew up with the idea that I could find “God’s Will” for my life.  Frederick Buechner said God’s will is this, “The place where God calls you is where your deep gladness meets the world’s deep hunger.”

If you seek the Kingdom of God and pursue the place where your deepest gladness and the world’s deepest needs meet, in that place your life will speak!  This intersection of what God is doing, and what you are asked to do creates the dance of love.

Andy Crouch, a well known Christian thinker said, “We shouldn’t try to 'save the world' but play our part in the redemptive work of this world with a small group of friends.”

Keep your eyes on the Kingdom.  Make it personal and do what you are called to do well, and do it with others.  Dance with your Creator!

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Five Distinct Behaviors that Undermine Self-Confidence and Block Trust in Marriage

  
As ministers, we take a huge hit everyday by thrusting ourselves out into the population of people who desperately need wisdom, care and a listening ear.  Because the needs are so huge, many times we neglect our marriages.  We can't take them for granted, because our marriage is the launching pad for our ministry.  When marriage goes down, it all goes down.  Here are a few barriers and builders to provoke your thinking.  Each barrier is replaced by a builder causing us to enjoy much greater improvement in our relationships as a couple.

Barrier 1: Assuming:
  • An unwillingness to consider the validity of your mate’s point of view.
  • Have you ever said, “I didn’t tell you because I knew you would get upset?” 
  • When we assume, we ignore the most beautiful characteristic of human beings…which is the ability to learn and change from day to day. 
  • Perhaps a good question to ask yourself before we assume is:  “What will happen if I don’t assume?” 
  • The answer is simple:  “I’ll find out!”
Builder 1: Checking:
  • An openness to understand your mate’s point of view.  “What was your understanding of what I expected?”
  • Checking is a way to learn how much understanding we have and how capable they are.
  • When we take time to check, we are saying that we respect the fact that the person is capable to make decisions, and that we are trying to make room for his or her growth.
  • Rule of thumb is to substitute dialogue and patience for assuming: “How can I use this situation to check out what this person knows, sees, is ready to learn, or can do?” 
  • Ask questions, don't make statements!
Barrier 2:  Rescuing or Explaining:
  • Disrespect of your mate’s ability to make wise decisions.  “Be sure you don’t forget your lunch!”
  • Too often we rescue or fix instead of allowing our mate to experience the consequences of their behavior. 
  • When we step in too quickly we are called rescuers or enablers.
Builder 2:  Exploring:
  • Listening with purpose to understand your mate’s point of view.
  • Explore the What? Why?  And How? Of an experience.
  • Ask questions:  “What is your understanding of what was happening?  What might have caused this to happen?  Having had that experience, what could you learn from it that might help you next time?”
  • Our patience in exploring experiences conveys this message:  “I see within you the capabilities to master situations and gain understanding.”
Barrier 3:  Directing:
  • Disconnecting or judging of your mate’s point of view.  “Pick up your shoes!  Put that away!”
  • It’s much easier to step in and direct than to invite their participation and accept that they might do things differently. 
  • When we are too quick to step in and direct, we produce hostility, aggression and resistance.
  • Directing is probably the most widespread barrier in families.  It is always “easier to do it myself.” 
Builder 3:  Encouraging/Inviting:
  • Empathy, which results from careful Listening.
  • Your mate feels encouraged when they see themselves as assets rather than objects,
  • See mistakes as opportunities to learn rather than as failures,
  • And invited participation and contributions rather than directing and demanding compliance.
  • When we encourage and invite, we motivate positive attitudes toward learning from experience.  “I would appreciate any help you could give me in straightening up the living room.”
Barrier 4: Expecting:
  • Blaming your mate for one’s own personal feelings.  “I was expecting more consideration.”
  • Expecting is setting high standards and then pointing out failure to reach these standards.
  • This is always discouraging and destructive experience.
  • Expecting is rooted in a disbelief in current capabilities and entails criticism of failures.
Builder 4:  Celebrating:
  • A genuineness conveyed through warmth and interest.
  • Too often we are preoccupied with what is not happening in a relationship and overlook what is.  “I appreciate the effort you put forth in our relationship!”
  • Need to celebrate any little movement in the right direction.  
  • That is a reason for great joy.”
Barrier 5:  Adultisms:
  • Lack of genuineness indicated by a tone of voice which contradicts the spoken message.
  • Unrealistic expectations that produce impotence, frustration, hostility, and aggression. 
  • The language of adultisms is, “Why can’t you ever?  How come you never? Surely you realize!  How many times do I have to tell you?  Why are you so childish? When will you ever grow up? Did You? Can you? Will you? Won’t you? Are you? Aren’t you?”
Builder 5: Respect:
  • Respect for differing points of view.
  • The language of respect is, “What was your understanding of what is appropriate?  Let me be sure I understand.”
  • When we have shown respect for the uniqueness of each individual’s most beautiful characteristic of the human race: we value our diversity.
Look at the Luke 2:46-47 and find the four reasons the intellectuals of the day were so impressed with Jesus' approach to them.  This secret can change your relationship for ever!

Friday, September 2, 2011

Captured by the Call


Our church was in horrible financial trouble.  Do we lay off staff, cut back the budget, minimize the vision, fast and pray for one day?  When pushed by loud voices that you must do something quick, the tendency is to lean on our own logic and reason.  Proverbs 3:4-6, “So you will find favor and good repute in the sight of God and man. Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.”  As a staff, we felt an overwhelming call to not cut back but "increase the vision!"  How do you increase the vision with a lack of money? 

The following Sunday, a single man came up beside me as I was sitting in the second row listening to the first speaker of the tag team, asking me if he could do something after feeling God speak.  I didn’t ask what he heard, because I felt the Spirit all over him.  When the speaker finished, he walked up, pulled out his wallet, and said, “I’m only doing what God told me to do.”  He took every bill out of his wallet and placed them on the stag floor, walked off, out the back door and left.  The silence in the room was deafening, when all of a sudden different ones started coming up placing all of their money on the stag.  It continued until money covered the complete stage.  I saw poor people giving all the change they had.  I observed rich people unfolding the secret compartments in their wallets and purses and empting all their money onto the floor.  So much money I thought, wow, we can pay off every bill and increase the vision, but God had different plans.  “Give it all away,” the inner voice of the Spirit said, “ask anyone who needs money to come up and take what they need.”  I couldn't help but stick with that voice.  The following week, I heard from so many people how God met their need.  The result of that miraculous Sunday was, the giving went up every week for the next two years. 

One of the miracles that day was the story of a single lady.  She told me how God told her to break up with her boyfriend and stop having sex.  She thought, this will not work out good for me because he won't buy me the tires he promised.  She looked into my eyes and said, “sure enough, that is exactly what happened."  As she sat in church that morning depressed, doubting her decision, the gentleman walked up and laid all of his money on the stage.  Her feeling went crazy, get up and get the money for your tires, but she froze.  She said, “as I hesitated, all the money was taken.”  As she sat in her seat following the service kicking herself for not getting up, two homeless men came up and give the money they had picked up because they felt God say, "give her your money."  She counted the money after they walked away, and it was exactly the amount needed for the tires.

The Japanese character for "crisis" is a combination of the characters for "danger" and "opportunity" (or promise); crisis is therefore not an end of opportunity but in reality only its beginning; the point where danger and opportunity meet; where the future is in the balance and where events can go either way.  Be encouraged, the Holy Spirit desires to lead you by the power of the name of Jesus. Know that you are loved, chosen and empowered to lead.  What kind of help do you need to break free, stop, get away and increase your vision?

Another translation of Prov. 3 is, “Put God first in everything you do and He will direct your ways, and crown your efforts with success.”

Captured by the Call


Our church was in horrible financial trouble.  Do we lay off staff, cut back the budget, minimize the vision, fast and pray for one day?  When pushed by loud voices that you must do something quick, the tendency is to lean upon our own logic and reason.  Proverbs 3:4-6 NAS, “So you will find favor and good repute in the sight of God and man. Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.”  As a staff, we felt an overwhelming call to not cut back but increase the vision.  How do you increase the vision with a lack of money? 

The following Sunday, a single man came up beside me as I was sitting in the second row listening to the first speaker of the tag team, he asked me if he could do something he felt God told him to do.  I didn’t ask what, because I felt the Spirit all over him.  When the speaker finished, he walked up, pulled out his wallet, and said, “I’m only doing what God told me to do.”  He took every bill out of his wallet and placed them on the stag floor, and walked off, out the back door and left.  The silence in the room was deafening, when all of a sudden different ones started coming up placing all of their money on the stage.  It continued until money covered the complete stage.  I saw poor people giving all the change they had.  I observed rich people unfolding the secret compartments in their wallets and purses and empting all their money onto the floor.  So much money I thought, wow, we can pay off every bill and keep going.  But God had different plans.  “Give it all away,” the inner voice of the Spirit said, “ask anyone who needs money to come up and take what they need.”  I chose to stick with that voice.  The following week, I heard from the deacons and elders, and without exception, they all said, “that was God, great job!”  The result of that miraculous Sunday was, the giving went up every week for the next two years. 

That afternoon we had a dedication of our new gym.  A single lady came to me afterwards asking if she could share her story.  She told me how God told her to break up with her boyfriend and stop having sex.  She thought, “that will not work out good for me because he promised to buy me the tires I needed so bad, and this would cause him to decide against buying the tires.”  She looked into my eyes and said, “sure enough, that is exactly what happened, and as I sat in church this morning depressed doubting her decision, that gentleman walked up and put his money on the stage.”  She went on telling me of her feeling as all the money was being placed upon the stage, she thought, “Wow, there’s my tires.”  But she said, “I hesitated, and by the time I got up, all the money was gone.”  As she sat in her seat following the service kicking herself for not getting up, two homeless men came up and shared that they felt God told them separately to give their money to the lady sitting in the fourth row.  She counted the money after they walked away, and it was exactly the amount needed for the tires.

Another translation of Prov. 3 is, “Put God first in everything you do and He will direct your ways, and crown your efforts with success.” 

The Japanese character for "crisis" is a combination of the characters for "danger" and "opportunity" (or promise); crisis is therefore not an end of opportunity but in reality only its beginning; the point where danger and opportunity meet; where the future is in the balance and where events can go either way.  Be encouraged, the Holy Spirit is leading you by the power of the name of Jesus. You are loved, chosen and empowered to lead.  What kind of help do you need to break free and increase your vision?

Friday, August 26, 2011

NAÏVE GRACE

Dear God, I don’t feel alone
since I found out about You.

Nora

The heart of Jesus loves us as we are
and not as we should be, beyond worthiness,
 beyond fidelity and infidelity;
He who loves us in the morning sun
 and the evening rain without caution,
 regret, boundary, limit, or breaking point.

Brennan Manning

WIDE – EYED LISTENING

A four year-old girl was over heard whispering
 into her newborn baby brother’s ear,
 “Baby,” she whispered,
 “tell me what God sounds like.
  I am starting to forget.”

Robert Bensen

Saturday, August 13, 2011

True Discipleship

The Greeks thought that by classroom teaching, "right thinking would produce right acting." Nothing changed....Jesus' way was out of the classroom, "right acting produces right thinking." Learning as you do things together, living in relationship with each other. That's discipleship! Our culture has lost this.....let's get it back!

Believe!

Remember, we are all agents of the King in every arena of society and culture. Push out and discover the power within you! Nothing more fulfilling than to feel the presence of God in and through you to change people's lives and create a movement where crowds come together only to go out and tell the story of Jesus. Believe!!

Life Today

May your eyes be opened wide to the adventure, light and beauty of life today. And be filled with the creative power to dream and live big, along with the confidence to walk it out. Remember, the loving arms of Jesus are wrapped around you, so pass the hugs, kisses and words of life on to others.